Lessons I Learned As a First-Year at NYU

In the spring semester of my first year, I decided that I was going to take Decision Modeling and Analytics (I know, it’s a mouthful!) at Stern for my Management concentration. I loved the course and learned so many needed skills such as navigating Excel and how to solve complex optimization problems.

However, the most important skill I learned was dealing with my pride and asking for help. My grades were not what I wanted them to be. I did not want to feel disappointed in myself because of my academic performance. I decided to ask my friend for her help because I knew she had a much stronger quantitative background than me.

My friend, Renita, was probably the sole reason I survived this class. She took the time to explain the concepts regardless of the hour. Even if it was 1AM and we were both working on the assignment, she would always put in the effort to help me. Even though I did meet Renita a while ago, we became much closer in this class. She is currently studying away in London and I am proud to say that we are still in touch. Through a combination of working with Renita and making adjustments to my own study habits, I was able to improve my grades dramatically.

I am truly grateful that I had the courage to ask for help, but I will confess it was hard. Asking for help involves admitting that you need it. It is extremely important to remember that asking for help is not a weakness, but a strength. It involves courage and humility for the giver and receiver.

A secondary theme of this story is this: the harder the class, the closer the friends you will make. You are often united by the goal of not failing. People do want you to succeed, but you must take charge of your success in your own way. Once you do, everyone will want to support you, and you never know if you will end up making one of your closest friends in the process. 

If you went on an NYU campus tour, there is a strong chance that you saw the video before introducing the Admissions Ambassadors. In the video, it uses the phrase “an overflowing cup of talented people” to describe NYU. I am here to tell you, that’s 100% accurate.

As much as I am enjoying my time as a Stern student, there were obstacles along the way. During my first year at Stern, I felt intimidated and scared that I was not as intelligent as my peers due to my academic struggles in the first year. I also did not get into the Stern Clubs which are infamous for being competitive. However, I want to clarify that this story is not meant to discourage anyone from applying to the Stern Clubs as a first-year. You should always take the chance. If you get in that’s amazing, but even if you don’t, that is okay too.

Also, as a commuter student, I was looking for a grounding point for me on campus. NYU is filled with so many talented people it is easy to feel intimidated and that you can not be true to yourself.

My friend Sophie showed me that you can be true to yourself here no matter how much imposter syndrome you may feel. She is talented in her own authentic right. She is also a commuter student, a fact that we bonded over in Project Outreach. NYU Project Outreach is a volunteer program that is hosted two weeks before the start of the school year. Students are assigned to groups, and each group volunteers at different locations around New York City. For example, I volunteered at the Grant Memorial and in Sunnyside, Queens.

Sophie is currently writing her own book and I could not be any more excited or proud of her! She shows that despite NYU being an “overflowing cup of talented people,” you can make your own path because you are a part of that cup.

Remember that you earned your place here, just like everyone else. There will be high and low points throughout your first year. However, surrounding yourself with the right crowd and remembering that you are here at NYU (even if you do not understand why you were chosen) helps you feel better.

As a first year, I felt lost. It was clear that I wanted someone I could talk to, but also someone with more experience than me. At Stern, there are many mentorship programs available, and these helped me form invaluable connections and opportunities to connect with upperclass students.

However, my best mentor (and I am honored to call her my friend too) I did not meet her through those programs. I met Andrea in the most unexpected way: Washington Square News. I has always wanted to channel my passion for food in some way, but I didn’t know how. On Instagram, I saw someone I knew from Project Outreach post her article about food. I reached out to her and she put me in touch with my now-friend Andrea. When I discovered that she is also a fellow Sternie and an Admissions Ambassador, I knew I had to meet her. When we hopped on a zoom call to meet each other, we got along so well, and I pitched my first article.

After the zoom meeting, we had supper together at Saigon Shack and we discussed a variety of topics: food, Stern, recruiting, living in the city. I shared with her concerns I was feeling for a long time about how to make most of my time at Stern. After talking to her, I felt so much better about pursuing my career. She encouraged me to feel better about myself then, and she continues to do so now. She and I met in the most unexpected way, but we are still very close to this day.

To be clear, this story is not to detract from being involved in mentorship programs. It is meant to alleviate the stress that those are the only ways to make close friendships with upperclass students. However, one should not stress about finding them, they will come to you. Trust that in time everything will work out and fall into place.

This lesson is the most important. This one was an accumulation of many “micro lessons” I learned from my friends during my NYU journey. It may seem the easiest, but it is actually the hardest of them all.

I will confess that I was scared that they were busy for this occasion since I asked them to come last minute. However, they all said yes. It warmed my heart more than they could imagine. Bill’s Burger was a special place for me growing up. I was so happy to take them all. Each one of these friends has been there for me when times got rough.

Last year, I was involved in an accident and Kareena was there with me the entire time. It was during freshman fall, when people were still new to each other. Kareena has continued to be there for me, and I strive to show the same support to her. She has a valuable skill of being able to let go of things easily. That is something that I have struggled with for the longest time. Plus, she is also one of the most driven people I know. 

Another time a friends was there for me was directly related to the Stern Clubs. As I mentioned before, I did not get in where I wanted to. Rejection is crushing, especially when you do not have access to the reasons why. When I wanted someone to talk to, I texted Deeksha during my class and we met afterwards to talk. She was calm and she patiently listened to everything I had to say. More importantly, she helped me reframe my rejection into a different perspective. She told me to appreciate what I have instead of focusing on the things I don’t. (I know, very wise of her!) She is one of the calmest and level-headed people I have met. 

The last two stories are slightly different, but they also show another side to this valuable lesson. It is also the simple things that friends do for each other matter as much as the bigger things.

Over the summer, I was in the process of obtaining an internship with a small financial planning firm. The firm asked me to provide character references–something I have never had to do before. My friend Abby supported me through my uncertainty. When I texted her for help, and she responded with “Of course I will do it.” And then, after a few days of her reference being sent, I ended up receiving an offer! Her support helped me advance in my career, which goes to  show that friends are an extremely powerful asset both personally and professionally. 

Last but not least, I want to tell you about my friend Nicole. After most of my activities, she always texts me, “Hey how did it go? What happened?” It is a simple gesture, but one I always appreciated. Recently, after the business careers fair, she texted me inquiring about how the event went for me. She remembers the small details about your life that you would not expect, and she is one of the easiest people to talk to. Her simple gesture showed me that friends will consistently support you. 

Even though I am still working through my sophomore year, I am reminded that I have a full support network to help me succeed. (And I hope I am giving that same support to others!) If my experiences have taught me anything, despite the rough patches, things do work out. I also hope you all picked up that none of these lessons were done through immense reflection, but rather an accumulation of shared experience–whether during 8 AM statistics, Waffle Wednesdays, or sitting in the park.

I know it’s easier said than done to tell incoming students not to worry too much about everything. But remember, your worries simply show that you care about your journey. You will make the effort to succeed here. Everyone’s journey is different, and that is the ultimate beauty of being a first-year at NYU.